AUG2013, THE 137th ARTICLE FOR BASEBALL GURU
HA, HA, HA
HILARIOUS BASEBALL JOKES AND SOME NOT SO HILARIOUS
Billy Martin had one game where he had four doubles but then he ran out of liquor.
I knew a man who collected bats but then they started to bite.
There was pitcher who was so bad the fan's started singing, "TAKE HIM OUT OF THE BALL GAME."
One umpire made so many bad calls That they dubbed him "THE DUMPIRE."
A man comes into a bar with his dog and says to the bartender that the dog can talk.
"No way" says the bartender. "I'll bet you a hundred bucks he can't.
"You're on," says the man and he puts the dog on a stool. "What's on the top of a house?"
"And what's on the outside of a tree?"
"Right, and who's the greatest ball player of all time?"
"Right again you owe me a hundred bucks.
The bartender is furious and throws both the man and the dog out of the bar.
Outside in the street the dog turns to the man, "Should I have said Ty Cobb??"
The Geography teacher started asking the class questions.
"Where is Pittsburgh?"
Sally answer's "Philadelphia."
"Very good .and how about Detroit?"
"Michigan" answers clever Tommy.
"Does anyone have any idea where St Louis can be found?"
Cute little Eddie chimes in with, "LAST PLACE."
A teacher tells her class she's a Yankee fan and asks them who's a Yankee's fan. Everyone raises their hands except little Mary who exclaims she's a Red sox fan.
"Why are you a Red Sox fan?" asks the Teacher.
"My parents are Red Sox Fans" answers Mary.
" You don't have to always follow your parents. What if they were morons, what would you be then??
" A YANKEE FAN!!"
SPEAKING OF THE YANKEES
How could you tell if George Steinbrenner was lying?
When his lips were moving,
How come folks like driving with a Yankee fan?
It's simple, you can always park in the Handicap Zone!
What's the difference between the average baby and and the Yankees?
After awhile the baby will stop whining.
What do you call 40 Millionaires gathered around a TV set watching the WS?
The NY Yankees.
A NY Yankees fan recently died from drinking milk. How come?
The Cow happened to fall on him,
Why can't the Yanks use the Internet?
They have a great deal of trouble putting three Ws together.
AND TO END ALL THIS:
What do you call a NY Met in the WS?
You see a Mets player wearing a WS ring. what do you call him?
Can you tell me the similarity between the Mets and Billy Graham?
They both have the ability to make 30.000 people stand up and shout, "Jesus Christ."
THAT'S ALL FOLKS.