The Games
Funniest Characters
MURPHY DROPPED THE KICK
John B Holway
Before every home game at Fenway, a fellow named Dropkick Murphy and his band
play Tessie, the song which had sparked the Red Sox and Braves to victory in
1903, 04, 12, 14, and 15. Murphy revived it in 2004, and you know the rest.
After a long search, I have finally found Dropkicks "Tessie" CD, and it's
atrocious.
He did a 1903 version and a 2004 version, and they're both the same, except the
words. Bam! Slam! SHOUT! Crash! Ka-BLOOM! If I was Tessie, I'd drop the Sox
like a hot foul tip (I think she already has) until they play her damn song
right.
He even threw in Athenry, a heart-achingly sad and haunting Irish classic, and
it sounded exactly like "Tressie.
Can't the Sox ask guest artists to take turns singing Tessie and then pick a
winner? It still may not be too late.
For the seventh inning stretch, I suggest another Irish oldie and goodie, Casey
Lowered the Boom.
My friend, Gabe Schechter (aka CharlesApril.com try it, youll like it) is not
surprised. He cites statistics to prove that three out of four National Anthems
are mangled in major league parks every day.
I replied that the worst one was Jose Feliciano at a Tigers World Series game.
But he sneered at my ignorance. The absolute worst, he said, was Roseanne Barr,
and since Gabe is a research associate at Cooperstown, he must have the numbers
to prove it.
So heres the challenge: Can you name the worst National Anthem youve ever
heard? The winner gets to listen to Dropkick for one solid hour. Second place
is two hours.
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John B Holway is author of TED, the Kid